Greenbank Bulletin

By Ian McKechnie and Judith Hirst 

Networking - does the mere thought of it fill you with dread?  If you're the type of person who'd rather spend time in the dentist's chair than walk into a room of strangers then you are definitely not alone!  For many, networking is a nerve-wracking experience - yet we know that it is increasingly important to reach out and develop your network and contacts whether it is to develop new business opportunities, identify business partners/suppliers or to enhance your own experience and career opportunities.

We have found that training on how to network is often delivered by people who are full of confidence and are perhaps 'natural' networkers, so in this article we hope to pass on some practical tips and hints for the 'Reluctant Networker' so that you can take those first steps into the networking arena.

Of course, if you are already a proficient networker you might find some additional ideas that will help you extend your skills and ensure that you make your networking effective, stimulating and productive.

Creating the right mindset

Some of the nervousness around networking is that it can seem to be all about you! Networking is not selling or simply telling or 'sponging' of others for your own benefit.

A much more positive approach is to think about networking as an exchange of ideas, views and experience.  Keith Ferrazi, a networking guru has this advice for the reluctant or nervous networker:  "They just have to realize that successful networking is all about building sincere relationships based on mutual generosity, not duplicity, and that they can't achieve their career goals on their own. They have to network their way to success"      

Tag along with a colleague

Chances are you already know someone who is already has an extensive network and enjoys meeting new people. Ask for their support - you probably have some skills and experience that you can share with them in return. Then next time he or she attends a networking function ask to tag along and observe how your colleague approaches people and keeps conversations going, so you can do the same. Your 'mentor' can also introduce you to other professionals and serve as a go-between so that it's easier for you to meet new contacts.

Remember that networking isn't 'selling'

We all know people who approach us at events and just want to talk about themselves or sell us their services…and we'll remember to avoid them next time.  So, instead, remember that networking is an indirect activity - you are probably not selling yourself to that person - but to the hundreds of people that person knows… 

So two things are important here:

1. Do they really know what you do and the value you add?  Can you rehearse them for conversations they might have about you after the event?
2. Will they be motivated to think of you and introduce you to others? 

Let's take each one of these in turn.. 

Prepare and practice your personal introduction

Nothing helps nervousness as much as solid preparation - it is a sure way to reduce your anxiety so first  prepare your personal 'elevator pitch' - a 30 second summary of who you are and your business. Here at Greenbank our tutors spend a lot of time on our programmes and in our coaching activities helping individuals and teams to develop their elevator speeches which will be impactful and engaging. Here are some of the guidelines we offer to our workshop participants: 

Outline your introduction

Write a few notes to help remind you what you want to say-they don't need to be complete sentences at this stage. We suggest you use the following questions to start you off:

• Who are you?
• What do you offer?
• What problems do you solve in your role?
• What makes you different?
• Why this might be of interest to the listener? 

Finalise your introduction

• Now take each note and write a sentence about it.
• Take each sentence and connect them together with additional phrases to make sure it flows.
• Go through what you have written and change any long words or jargon into everyday language
• Go back through your re-written material and cut out unnecessary words
• Finalise your introduction to no more than 90 words. A good elevator speech will be conversational and will last 30 seconds or less. At three words per second for normal speaking, you need 90 words or less. 

 Practice your introduction

• You need to know your elevator speech by memory. It should come to you as naturally as saying your name; it should be second nature. The only way to achieve this is by practice.
• Read your introduction our aloud several times
• Say it out loud in front of a mirror
• Get a friend, partners, colleague to ask you for your introduction and say it several times to them
• Use the feedback you get to modify your introduction if necessary 

Now that you are confident and fluent with your introduction you can confidently use it when meeting with new people. But remember your introduction is highly targeted - for instance is the person from your own organisation or a different business sector - so if your audience changes, you may well need to re-format it to make sure it is still effective.

Getting the conversation started - Focus on THEM

It can seem intimidating walking up to a new person or starting a conversation with that person sitting next to you at a management meeting or conference. But there is always one subject they are guaranteed to be interested in…themselves.  So good questioning is key here - here are some questions to help you move the conversation to the next level:

• How did you get your start in this business?
• What do you enjoy most about it?
• What separates you and your company from the competition?
• What advice would you give someone just starting out in your business?
• What significant changes have you seen happen in your profession through the years?
• What do you see as the coming trends in your sector/ business?
• How can I help you?
• What ways have you found most effective for promoting your business?
• What one sentence would you like people to use in describing the way you do business
• How can I know if someone I am speaking with would be a good contact for you?
• How can I help you?
• So in a parallel universe, what would you be doing if you weren't doing xxxxxxxx?
• I am curious...I am interested...I am wondering...
• Tell me more about that... 

Have a plan or purpose

Often reluctant networkers tell us that they feel lost in networking situations, it all seems to be about 'small talk' and they find themselves keeping their heads down, reaching for their Blackberry or staying safely on the edge of groups and conversations. 

The experienced Networkers always have an idea of what the goal is for each event they attend.  They know, before going in, why they are there and what the outcome you want for yourself or for others.  Do you want to meet 3 people and focus on getting to know them really well?  Are you looking for an introduction to a certain type of organisation or individual?  

When you have a plan, a reason for meeting and talking to people it is easier to stay focused and achieve your desired outcome.

Look on the bright side

If at any time you feel your old networking fears resurfacing as you progress, focus on the many positive aspects of the process:

• People want your help. Your advice, expertise and list of contacts are unique and may help many other professionals.
• You need only one connection. A single quality contact can introduce you to several others.
• Networking is quick and easy. It doesn't require constant communication, just consistent follow up. Try arranging a lunch date, writing letters or sending emails to keep in contact with members of your network.

No matter how committed you are to improving your networking skills, change won't occur overnight. In fact, you will probably be setting yourself up for failure if you expect to be the world's best networker within a week. Becoming an effective networker is a gradual process, but it's still one that can be mastered with the right approach and practice. And who knows? with practice comes confidence and you might even start enjoying the opportunity to meet new people, extend your network and share with others your skills, experience and expertise!